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Collected Poems 1947-1997 - Ginsberg Allen - Страница 73


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73

Angkor Wat

     Angkor—on top of the terrace

in a stone nook in the rain

Avalokitesvara faces everywhere

   high in their stoniness

         in white rainmist

   Slithering hitherward paranoia

      Banyans trailing

      high muscled tree crawled

     over the roof its big

     long snaky toes spread

      down the lintel’s red

         cradle-root

         elephantine bigness

      Buddha I take my refuge

   bowing in the black bower

   before the openhanded lotus-man

         sat crosslegged

   and riding in the rain in the

         anxious motorcycle putting

         in the wetness my shirt

         covered with green plastic

            apron shivering

               and throat choking

                  with upsurge

                  of stroke fear

                     cancer Bubonic

                     heart failure

                  bitter stomach juices

         a wart growing on my rib

         Objection! This can’t be

                     Me!

What happens to me when I get high

The echo of Sitaram, Sitaram Hindu

fears—eat no meat or vomit

the body—warnings in dream bearded

Das Thakur—obsessed

         with meat, smoking, ganja

         sex, cannibal spies, Propagation

         of this Skin, thin

         vegetable soups, they was

all Chinese eating pigs, was seven

         slanteyes watching me drink tea

         till I saluted the Buddha-baby in

            the cloth flowered pram

            sucking its chubby plum

Music from Walt Disney hearts and roses

            sweet violins—

         yellow skins landing on the green

            vegetable planet—

seven children with identical haircuts

            very polite, saluting

                  clasped hand bow—

the Fear ordering peas in the French

         restaurant, with whole garlic

         bread cheese and coffee hot

and

a

b

a

n

a

n

a to finish the bill on the table

pink

p

o

n

k of the rain on the roof tin

below my shuttered window

   in the neon light a Hotel

      clean tiled room

U

n

d

e

r a fan and canopied mosquito net

All well in this solitude, plenty money

for a long ride thru the forest in a

         rainy afternoon with

            long hair wet beard

         glasses clouding—and that

         nausea—passing out

      of the Churning of the Ocean

         asuras with teeth fangs

            and fat eared Devas

            with military mustaches

         hanging on to the great Chain Snake

            muscle sandstone railing

            length of the moat-bridge to

the South Gate, Avalokitesvara’s huge

         many faces in opposite directions

               in high space

         thru which ran new black road

         at the knees of greater trees, one

needed a haircut, root-hair sprouting

   on branches—thru the forested

   Castle grounds to pathways fallen

      sandstone headless statues

   Damp black bas-relief Dancing Shiva

            or angel lady

The huge snake roots, the vaster

            serpent arms fallen

         octopus over the roof

      in a square courtyard—curved

      roofcombs looked Dragon-back-stone-scaled

As frail as stone is, this harder wooden

            life crushing them

   with the cricket-glare and parrot

         squads walking across the roof

—last nite full moon in misted heaven

and slow girl dance bent elbow and inspring

   fingers snaking it thru the middle—

      I am afraid where I am

   “I am inert” … “I’m just doing my

      Professional duty” … “I’m scheming

73
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