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Collected Poems 1947-1997 - Ginsberg Allen - Страница 45

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Back to the same old smiling

dentist—

The Bloomfield police car

with its idiot red light

revolving on its head

balefully at Eternity

gone in an instant

—simultaneous

appearance of Bankrobbers

at the Twentieth Century Bank

The fire engines screaming

toward an old lady’s

burned-in-her-bedroom

today apocalypse

tomorrow

Mickey Mouse cartoons—

I’m disgusted! it’s Unbelievable!

What a funny horrible

dirty joke!

The whole universe a shaggy dog story!

with a weird ending that begins again

till you get the point

‘It was a dark and gloomy night…’

‘in every direction in and

out’

‘You take the high road

and I’ll take the low’

—everybody lost

in Scotlands of mind-consciousness—

Adonoi Echad!

It is not One, but Two,

not two but Infinite—

the universe be born and die

in endless series in the mind!

Gary Snyder, Jack, Zen thinkers,

split open existence

and laugh & Cry—

what’s shock? what’s measure?

when the Mind’s an irrational

traffic light in

Gobi—

follow the blinking lights of contrariety!

What’s the use avoiding rats

and horror, hiding from Cops

and dentists’ drills?

Somebody will invent

a Buchenwald next door

—an ant’s dream’s

funnier than

ours

—he has more of them

faster and seems

to give less of

a shit—

O waves of probable

and improbable

Universes—

Everybody’s right

I’ll finish this poem

in my next life.

…….with eye opening

slowly to perceive

that I be coming out

of a trance—

one look at the lipstick

it’s a nurse

in a dentist’s office

that first frog

thought leaping out of

the void

… a glimpse

out of which the whole

process unfolds this

universe & logically

and symmetrically next

unbuilds it in exact

reverse till you arrive

back at the Nothing

in which one chance

note was originally

struck…

, the Czardas

of Creation, the first banal chord

establishing Music forever in

its mechanical jukebox

… and the whole

structure unfolds

itself inevitably and

folds back into

Nothing again …

—the same man

crossing the street looking

both ways watch out for

the cars—

and each time, returning

with a jerk of the face

(p’raps a dental touch)

dictated by the sinking

sensation, Oof! I’ve

been hoodwinked—

again like

someone in the Circus

defying death, got thrown

into the orchestra—

Note the music blaring

with an indifferent flourish of Triumph

a nightmare Razz

—as the acrobat leaps

out into the void—

Me! I made that Last Chance

jump off the wire

way high up in the Big Top

long ago …

it’s happening again!

I wake up dazed …

it being the dream

of someone in a dentist’s

chair in a Universe he

imagines—coming out

of gas—

it’s only happening

in the closed universe of

illusion

III

A nice day in the Universe on Broad Street—sun shines today as it never shone before and never will again—stillness in the blue sky—the church’s gold dome across the park sending and receiving flashes of light—I feel heartsick to destroy this all—

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