After Forever Ends - Ramone Melodie - Страница 97

• Предыдущая
• 97/143
• Следующая

Alexander stood there for just a moment in the centre of the room and looked at me. There was real fear in his eyes.

“Go, Alex, and you better hope it’s not too late.”

Without another word Alexander spun and bolted out the door, not even bothering to close it.

“Nitwit,” I muttered and then I began to laugh. I laughed until my sides ached, wishing desperately that Oliver had been there to see what I’d just done. He’d have been so proud of me.

Lucy and Oliver came home about three hours later. “She’s all better,” He told me, “Just tired and wanting her pillow.”

“Are you OK then, Sissy?”

Lucy gave me a weak smile, “I’m OK,” She said softly, “Oliver and I talked a long time tonight. I think I understand what’s happening with Alex. I’m just exhausted now.”

“Well, lie down then.”

“Where is Xander?”

I began to laugh again and told them the whole story.

“Oh, shite!” Oliver wiped his eyes, “I think I’m going to pee myself! I’m telling you, right now Alexander is checking every place she could possibly be staying between Newtown and Welshpool! He may even have gone to London! That’s hilarious!”

“I hope he runs out of petrol and has to walk home,” Lucy held her side, lying back on the couch.

“Ah, go to sleep,” I told her, “I got your revenge for you!”

“I love you, Sissy. Thank you.”

“It was my pleasure,” I grinned as I exited the room, “Night now.”

“You are so bloody clever!” Oliver put his arm around me, still laughing, and led me to the bedroom, “I’m so proud I’m married to you!”

The sun was up when I heard the front door close and keys land on the kitchen table. There were three footsteps and then silence.

Alexander had come home.

I listened, curious to hear if Lucy had woken up as well, but the house was still. I couldn’t take the suspense. I crept out of bed and padded my way as quietly as I could to the doorway. I tiptoed into the hall and peered around the wall.

Alexander was clinging to my sister, holding her close like a rag doll. I could barely hear what he said, “Oh, God, Lucy! I thought you’d left me! I thought you’d gone…”

“I thought about it,” She whispered, “But I couldn’t.”

“Don’t ever leave me. Please. I’m sorry. I love you. God, I love you…” He kissed her head and her face, little kisses, lots of them, all over.

“I love you, too, Alex. I wanted to leave, but I couldn’t.”

“Lucy, I’ve been such a scrut.”

“Yes, you have.” She put her hand against his cheek. “I forgive you. You know I do.”

“I’m a cocky bastard,” He continued, “And I’ve got a hard head. I don’t listen. A long time ago I could have walked away and let you go, but I can‘t…I need you, Lucy. I act like I don’t care, but I do…”

“I know you do.”

“She messed me up so bad…I can’t even explain how she messed up my head. She made it so I don’t know who I am anymore. I used to know and now I second guess myself…I’m trying…I really am. I’m trying to be what you need me to be…I need a second, yeah? I’m trying so hard…“

“I know. I didn’t mean to pressure you…I just wish you’d talk to me…“

“Don’t give up on me. Please. I want us to be the thing in my life I didn’t ruin. I want you to be the one thing in my life that I did right.”

“Alex, it’s all right, Sweetie! We’re all right!”

“Let me do the right thing, Lucy. Please, for once in my life, let me do the right thing. Give me a second. I didn’t expect this, but I’m trying…please, let me do the right thing…”

“Alexander!” She hissed, taking his face between both of her hands, “Stop!”

“No! “ He shook his head, “I don’t want to stop. I want to explain. I want to tell you everything.

I want you to know everything…“

“Xander! “ She was smiling, laughing softly. She pressed her lips against his, “It’s all right. I know you’re screwed up! I know you’re a prick! I love you anyway! Don’t you know it?”

“Will you marry me then, Bach?” He took her hand, "I don’t have a ring for you. I’ve been too much of a coward to get one… “

Lucy gasped and threw her arms around him.

He was still muttering when I slipped around the corner and back into my bed. I’d seen enough of my sister’s perfect moment. There wasn’t a thing about any of it that had been any of my business, but that moment on belonged only to my sister and Alexander. Oliver was still fast asleep, sprawled out on the mattress, snoring lightly, his face pressed against the pillow. I lie beside him and put my leg over his middle and my arm around his chest.

He reached back and patted my calf, “Just Silvia…and I love her…” He mumbled.

I just lie there and stroked his hair, “And I love you,” I whispered.

The sad news of our dear Lucy coming to stay with us in the wood was that eventually she left. And when she did, she took Alexander, Nigel and Nattie with her. It wasn’t completely tragic as they only went as far as to buy a lovely house outside of Welshpool, but for me it was heartbreak. I had, after all, raised Nigel and Natalie as if they were my own and now I had to hand them over to a new mummy. Even if that new mummy was my own sister, the whole thing sucked completely.

I cried and cried the day they left. Alexander didn’t understand it at all, “Silvia, my God!” He told me irritably, “It’s not like they’re being shipped off to live with strangers! We are their parents!”

“Oh, shut up!” I snapped back, “I’ve been with those two children twenty-four seven for as long as Nattie’s been alive! Don’t tell me I’m not allowed to be sad about them going!”

“All I’m saying is that it’s not so bad.”

“And I'm saying it’s the worst thing ever, now piss off!”

I did a fair job of pulling it together for the next few hours and not crying it in front of Nigel and Nattie, but once they had gone, I cried like someone had died.

Oliver went back and forth between comforting Carolena, who had planted herself on the front porch in a stubborn attempt to force Alexander to allow Nigel to stay, and me, who was sobbing hopelessly in the kitchen.

“They’ll be back,” He rubbed my shoulders. “They didn’t move out of country! They’re fine!”

“How do I know that?”

“Silvia,” Oliver sighed, “You know I love you, but you have control issues, Sweetheart. You don’t need to protect them from Alex and Lucy.”

“Alex I do! He’ll bash Nigel!”

“No, he won’t bash him!” Oliver laughed, “No more than the boy needs! And whether you want to admit it or not, Nigel needs a bash here and there! Alex won’t beat him to death! Our dad would strike us when we were particularly terrible and we lived!”

“But I won’t see them every day!” I bawled, “Lucy’s staying home with them! They’re my babies sure as I bore them out of my own body and I had to give them away! Just like that! Bang! They’re gone!” I know it sounds insane, but I swear my breasts were aching like they did just after my own children were born. It was like a physical need to find Nattie and Nigel and hold them close. “I miss them so much!”

“Ah, Sil, I know. I miss them, too, already. It’s way too quiet. No one’s screaming, nothing’s spilling or breaking. Alexander’s not shouting. It’s very strange.” He glanced around the room, “But I need you to come with me now. Caro wants you outside. She doesn’t quite understand what’s happening and she needs you to help her see why they’ve left. She’s had it with me. She’s says she’ll stand on the porch until Nigel comes home.”

It was even harder on Carolena to watch them go. She didn’t understand at all why we couldn’t all just continue to live together at the wood. She’d never known it any other way. “Why can’t they sell their house?” She demanded, clinging to her yellow rabbit, “And come back here?”

“Uncle Alex has asked Auntie Lucy to marry him,” I tried to explain, crouching in front of her so I could look her in the eye, “When people get married they get a house of their own.”

• Предыдущая
• 97/143
• Следующая